Monday, August 8, 2011

The Good, The Bad, and The Beautiful

In a nutshell, I think that today was a good day for Lily and a very hard day for her mommy and daddy.  Today Lily was much less sedated, which is good.  In fact, I got to see, for the very first time, Lily open her eyes!  Without the heavy sedation, however, Lily is much more squirmy and unhappy about all of her tubing.  It was very hard for Cassandra to see her little girl’s discomfort, and we quickly found that if we did not touch or talk to her, she would sleep comfortably most of the day.  So for us, it was a hard day with little touching or talking to Lily. 

Lily had a good day with less sedation, no dopamine, and lowered levels of oxygen.   Someone used her Lovey as a pillow underneath her (this hospital is not as interested in Loveys as the last one), so Cassandra carried a sock around till it had her smell and gave that to Lily instead.  That is the ratty old red and black thing you may see in the pictures.

Was it a good day for Grandma?  Yes it was.  First, as I said before, I got to see Lily with her eyes open.  Secondly, I got my “Grandma” badge.   It’s about time!   I’ve been waiting for it for days.   Thirdly, I got to babysit for an hour and a half today.  I wanted to read Lily a story, but under the circumstances, I couldn’t.  I had to settle with humming to her.  After hearing the angels in heaven, and then coming to earth and hearing the crooning of her parents, my humming probably made Lily think she’d died and gone to the bad place.  But don’t worry, Lily showed great fortitude.  She probably kept reminding herself that babies can’t go there; all babies go to heaven.  Whatever else she did to stay calm, I don't know, but it worked, and her levels stayed good the whole time. 

Also today I finished one of her two hooded towels.  It’s pretty fancy with lots of crocheted stuff on it.  I don’t know if any of my other grandkids will get such decorated towels, but if they complain, I’ll just remind them that Lily would have much rather been at home without fancy towels than at the NICU with Grandma crocheting up a storm. 
Well, that’s the report.   I think it’s a good one.


  1. Lily is beautiful and the towel looks so good!! Our prayers are with you all.

  2. My heart absolutely aches for Cassandra. I didn't get to hold my baby right away because I had a c-section and had to recover, and that was hard. I can't imagine how hard it must be for her to only be able to see her baby from a distance. Let her know I am thinking of her often and praying for her little baby girl.